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“Don’t Expect Me To Prepare Fancy Food” Woman Refuses To Play Hostess Right After Giving Birth

A woman is wondering if she is in the wrong for not planning to be a good hostess while her in-laws are visiting.

To Be A Good Host Or Not To Be

'Tina', 3 weeks postpartum, questions if she should host her visiting in-laws or prioritize recovering. Feeling overwhelmed by her husband’s family visit, she faces a dilemma.

Three Weeks Postpartum

3 weeks postpartum, Tina agreed to host her in-laws for a week. Anger and resentment set in after her husband's demands for fancy foods.

They Will Spend Most Time At Her House

“Although the 7 of them would be staying at an Airbnb, I know they will be spending all day every day at our home to see the kids.”

She Tells Him She Will Not Cater To Them

"I told my husband we're ordering meals, and I won't shop much. I'm breastfeeding, up all night, dealing with our toddler, and anticipate 7 guests," said Tina.

He Expects Her To Be A Good Hostess

Tina's husband expects a lot when his family visits, requesting specific items for his parents and kids. She fears managing these requests involving trips to various places. He even planned to ask her dad to fetch some items. Read More...

She Explains Her Side

Tina, 3 weeks postpartum, isn't trying to play host. She insists they can eat grocery store food. Frustrated, she believes her husband values his family's comfort over her well-being.

Husband Doesn’t Usually Help

"My husband prioritizes his family's comfort during visits, leaving me to handle house chores and other duties. I feel neglected and unsupported in these instances."

Relatives Should Help In Fourth Trimester

Many agree with Tina's frustration. One respondent said, "visiting relatives during the fourth trimester should help or leave. Anything more is supremely gracious."

She Has No Obligation To Be A Good Host

Another person adds, “You do not visit a 3 weeks postpartum mom of a new baby and toddler and expect to be wined and dined with ‘the best’ and/or be entertained.”

The In-Law Should Be More Understanding

Tina's husband is criticized for his lack of support. Critics say if he previously withdrew during family visits, it's likely he'd do the same now, aggravating the current situation.

Her Husband Should Be More Considerate

Tina isn't wrong to prioritize her recovery over visitors' needs after childbirth. As expressed, “The new mom isn't wrong, the husband is."

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