The Family Dilemma: Husband’s Burnout Over Wife’s Demands
A man shares his frustration with his wife who refuses to be away from him or their children for extended periods of time.
Introduction
A husband, who we’ll call ‘John’, is unable to take his kids out without his wife. John’s wife insists on accompanying them everywhere they go. She ruins the atmosphere and complains about irrelevant reasons like the weather, and if left alone, she becomes angry with the kids for abandoning her and with the husband for his actions.
Wife is a Helicopter Mom
The wife is a helicopter mom who cannot emotionally handle being alone. She demands that every single thing that they do be done together, even if it’s just a short trip to the store. She only allows the kids to do planned activities like music and academic classes, and demands that the husband be present as well.
Inefficient And Exhausting
According to John, “she only activities she allows the kids to do are planned activities like music and academic classes, and she has to be present at all of them. She also demands I be present as well. It’s so inefficient and exhausting.”
On Short Trips
He further explains that his wife acts this way even for short trips.
“[My] wife is a helicopter mom who cries and screams if I take the kids without her for 30 mins. I’m not talking about camping trips or anything significant without her, I’m talking about a walk to the park to play some basketball for less than an hour. She’ll call every 10 minutes demanding we return home because of illogical reasons.”
She’s Always Been Clingy
John elaborated futher, saying that his wife has always been ‘clingy’ ever since he’s known her.
“She’s always been like this. She can’t emotionally handle being alone, ever. I don’t have a job or volunteer anywhere because she’s so attached to me literally 24/7, then when the kids finish school she’s attached to all of us.”
Wife Needs Therapy
Many people responded to John’s story with sympathy for his wife. Many agree that the wife needs therapy to address her need to be with her family at all times. One person suggests that the husband should not be annoyed with her, but rather have a loving conversation with her about seeking help.
One person stated, “Wife needs therapy. Badly.”
Becoming A Mom Has Its Own Struggles
Another said, “Becoming a mom instills you with so many new fears and intrusive thoughts. She is not alone and needs to learn to work through it.” They added, “try to not be annoyed with her and maybe just one night after the kids go to sleep plan a little time with her and voice your concerns in a loving way and see if she’d be open to talking to a therapist and opening up about what is causing the need to be together consistently. It’s going to be a very fine line of a conversation but try to not point fingers or make her feel ashamed, just try to get her to open up about it and see if she’d be open to help.”
Helicopter Parenting Can Be Harmful
Another commenter points out that helicopter parenting can be harmful to children and suggests that the husband take responsibility for ensuring their well-being.
“This is TERRIBLE for your children. Look up some articles on the stats around kids who were helicoptered and articles with their own words. It can be just as bad/worse than neglect because of the outcomes. Now it’s your responsibility to make sure your kids are okay by any means necessary.
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Source: Reddit