As her daughter and stepchildren reach adulthood, a woman’s second husband is pressuring her to split her daughter’s inheritance from her deceased father equally amongst all children.
A Reddit thread has recently garnered a lot of attention after the original poster (OP) shared her dilemma surrounding her daughter’s inheritance from her late husband.
The thread was opened by OP lamenting her late husband. “When my daughter was 7, we lost her father to an avoidable accident. Due to that and the subsequent settlement, my daughter was able to have a trust fund of sorts that provided for college, grad school if she wanted, and even some left over for whatever life might bring. It is money that, managed wisely, would enable her to have a head start in life. She knows about this and has never taken [it] for granted, given where the money came from. After all, we’d both rather have her father around than the money.”
She Remarries To A Man With Two Children of His Own
Six years after her late husband passed, OP remarried another man with two children of his own. “That said, life moves on, and I remarried six years after my former husband’s passing to a lovely man who has two children of his own. All the children live with us primarily, with his children seeing their mother on vacations as she lives across the country.”
Both Daughters are Heading To College
The issue came up because both daughters are now heading to college. Her daughter was admitted to her dream school, where her late father was an alumnus. “She has this old sweatshirt of his that she kept to remind her of him. She cried so much when she got in, and both her stepfather and I were proud of her because she worked hard to get in.
“My stepdaughter will also be attending a wonderful school that is one the top-ranked schools for her interests.” She added that the inheritance issue has now cropped up with the need for funds for her stepdaughter’s higher education.
Stepdaughter Will Have To Take Out Loans
OP describes the situation: both her stepchildren have college funds; however, their funds are much smaller than her daughter’s. “Because her parents cannot afford to pay the tuition in its entirety, [my stepdaughter] will have to take some loans. But, all told, she will graduate with about $40K in loans which I think is still quite modest for the school she’s attending and her earning prospects post-graduation.”
However, her daughter will graduate with no debt. This has suddenly become a problem for OP’s husband.
“He wants us to split up my daughter’s fund between all three kids because then they could all have college fully paid for.”
Daughter’s Situation Changes If Inheritance Is Split
The woman expresses that her daughter will only have a little money left over if her inheritance was split between all three children. Further, the daughter has expressed interest in attending grad school, but if the inheritance is split, she will need to borrow student loans to be able to pay for grad school.
The woman’s husband does not see this as an issue, stating that “everyone will start off on an equal footing post-college.
However, OP thinks this is unfair to her daughter because “her father had to [pass away] for this money, and this is like her inheritance from him.”
Husband Thinks Daughter Should Be Happy To Share
OP’s husband believes that his stepdaughter should be happy to share her inheritance with her step-siblings. However, OP does not want to put her daughter in a position of feeling guilty and ultimately agreeing out of guilt. I have expressed all this to my husband, and he thinks that I’m being selfish, that I’m teaching my daughter to be selfish, and I don’t consider my [stepchildren] the same as my daughter.”
Most Comments Are In Woman’s Favor
In the Reddit thread where the woman posted to get advice, most comments favor not splitting the inheritance. Many were appalled that the current husband dares to request this of a child who lost her father.
One commentor said, “The gall of him. OP’s daughter lost her father. There can never be anything fair between her and her step-siblings. They have their dad. [The] husband needs to back the hell off. That money is compensation for a terrible loss which only OP and her daughter suffered. How dare [her] husband now make it about him and his kids? [She] needs to talk to [her] daughter directly about this and tell her that it is her money and she should not feel guilty for having it and she should not give it away.
“This needs to be nipped in the bud and not even open for discussion,” another Redditor said.
What do you think about this situation?