Should A Mom Withhold Showing Affection To Her Child To Appease Others?
A woman is told she is insensitive after showing affection to her daughter in front of her infertile cousin.
Woman Gets Pregnant In Highschool
The original poster (OP) got pregnant in highschool. “I got pregnant at 17 a couple months before I graduated high school. I was subject to relentless bullying from classmates, teachers random adults. My cousin attended the same high school as me and was in the same year, and was considered popular among our peers. She was one of the people who bullied me most. She was relentless and made my life miserable along with her complicit mother (my aunt) who loved to make comments too. My parents ended up falling out with them over this so it was minimum contact for years.”
Her Life Turns Around
“My life was miserable because of them mostly but I got through it,” OP said. “My then boyfriend got a job and I did my degree online while working part time and we got through it. We are now married, and both have very well paying jobs. I now have a 6 year old and another baby on the way and I wouldn’t change a thing. My parents adore their granddaughter, and her great grandparents absolutely spoil her, and love it too. Our families eventually made up too through our grandparents though this is fairly recent, and I don’t see my cousin that much as I do resent her.”
Infertility Issues
OP notes that her cousin is infertile due to medical reasons. My cousin is unable to get pregnant and is medically infertile. Her and her husband tried for a long time and her husband recently left her because he wants biological kids. She is understandably devastated.”
They Meet At A Family Gathering
The cousins saw each other again at a family gathering. “It was my mothers birthday and the whole family attended the get together,” OP recalls. I showed my mom the scans and revealed the pregnancy at the party. My mother and everyone else was overjoyed. My cousin didn’t say much, neither did her mom, but I thought that’s fair enough. Later on I was cuddling my daughter and being silly with her, and everyone was telling me how lovely she is and how lucky I am.”
Cousin Felt Offended
OP’s cousin got sensitive at this point. “My cousin got up, left and slammed the door. Everyone said to let her sulk, so her mum took her side and said I was being super insensitive and should apologize. I told her I still haven’t received an apology for their abortion and slut comments so I won’t be apologizing to anyone, so she left too.”
Family Is Divided
“My family is divided. Some think I should apologize to keep peace, some say I have done nothing wrong. I think I maybe should have been more sensitive as I see where it could have been salt in the wound but I am unsure on apologizing.”
Others Say She Did Nothing Wrong
Many don’t think that OP did anything wrong in showing affection to her daughter. One person commented, “You don’t stop celebrating life because someone else can’t produce it.
Another said, “It should never be on the bullied to apologize to keep the peace. Put the onus on the ones responsible for the lack of peace to begin with.”
Another Said She Got Karma
Another person said that her cousin got karma. “Karma. Do they really expect you to not treat your child with love and affection because they’re around? Sounds like they’re still the same as they were when you were in highschool.”
What would you do in this situation?
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This article has been inspired by the internet and does not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of Arnie Nicola
