My Daughter Came Home Sulking’ Teacher Keeps Doing This Without Permission

An overly sensitive woman is having second thoughts on whether she should have asked her daughter’s teacher to stop redoing her daughter’s hair at school.

The Backstory

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“My husband and I have a 5-year-old daughter who’s currently attending kindergarten,” Susie said. “She’s the sweetest girl that there is and she has long hair. Both my husband and I work. Sometimes he leaves before I do, sometimes I leave first, and when this happens, he’s in charge of doing her hair and dropping her at school.”

The Dad Is Not Great At Doing Hair

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The five-year-old girl’s father is not a master of doing hair, but it is one of her favorite things when he does it. “My husband is no master of doing hair and most of the time her pigtails or braids are crooked, but my baby loves her father and him doing it is one of her favorite things in the world.”

Susie Notices Her Daughter’s Hair

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“These past few times I noticed that my daughter’s hair was well done despite knowing it was my husband who did it,” Susie recalls, “so one time while driving home I complimented it and told my daughter how “daddy was getting better.””

Daughter Sulks

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After Susie compliments her daughter’s hair, her daughter became visibly upset and started sulking. “She got sulky and made a face,” Susie said. “I asked what was wrong and she said her teacher had been re-doing her hair because it looked ”weird” and even when she said ”no thanks” a few times she still did it.”

Daughter Likes When Her Teacher Does Her Hair

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Susie asked her daughter if she liked it when her teacher does her hair. Her daughter said she does like it, however she doesn’t want her teacher to redo her hair when her dad does her hair.

“I asked if she liked her doing it and she said she did, but not when daddy made her hair because she liked his more.”

Susie Confronts Teacher

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The next time Susie dropped off her daughter, she spoke with the teacher and asked her to stop doing her hair “regardless of what she thought looked weird or nice”. Susie recalls that the teacher “got red in the face and apologized a few times.”

“I kept telling her it was no big deal, but to respect my daughter’s opinion,” Susie said.

Susie’s Mother Reacts

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“Yesterday while having dinner, my daughter mentioned the incident and my mom got mad at me,” Susie said. “For context, my mom was also a kindergarten teacher and said that what I did was not okay and that I humiliated someone who was trying to help my daughter because she has seen how my husband does my daughter’s hair, and that I should apologize when my daughter goes back to school.”

Another Teacher Reacts

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“I’m a kindergarten teacher and this crosses a boundary,” another teacher responds. “I put barrettes back in and if a ponytail completely falls out I will help fix it, but to completely take down a hairdo and redo it because the teacher doesn’t like it – no. And to actually tell your daughter that she thinks it looks weird, double no. The teacher might have good intentions but it’s still not something that she needs to take upon herself to do, especially after your daughter asked her not to.”

Grandma Is Overreacting

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Someone else offered their opinion: “Honestly doesn’t seem like [anyone’s in the wrong] in this situation besides your mom for trying to make you feel bad for doing what your daughter asked. The teacher was trying to help, realized they overstepped and seemed to be genuine in apologizing. If your daughter prefers her dad’s way, who is Grandma to override that?”

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