One woman laments the short time frame people checked in on her after she gave birth.
First Time Mom Laments Lack Of Support
Many new moms are wondering how long people check in on them after their babies are born. For some, it might come as a surprise that the novelty of having a newborn quickly wears off for most people.
“One thing that has surprised me after becoming a parent is how quickly the novelty of you having a baby wears off for other people,” said one new parent. “I’m only 24 days in and I’ve already noticed that people check in a lot less/barely check in now than they did in the first week.”
When it comes to postpartum support, it’s important to remember that it’s not a one-time thing. New parents need ongoing support and comfort throughout the first year of their baby’s life. Instead of the sporadic ‘how’s motherhood going?’ calls, friends and family should strive to be more consistent in their check-ins.
New parents often struggle with a lack of sleep, exhaustion, and isolation as they transition into parenthood. Having a consistent support system can make a huge difference in helping them get through the hard times. It’s important that friends and family make sure to check in regularly to offer their help, advice, and words of encouragement. Having someone to rely on can make all the difference for those first-time parents.
Just because the novelty wears off doesn’t mean the support should. New parents need consistent check-ins from friends and family to ensure that they’re coping with the demands of being a parent.
Other People’s Experiences Vary
The postpartum period can be a challenging time for new parents and a consistent source of support is key. However, some parents don’t get support past the first week postpartum. As one new parent said, “People checked in for the first week or so. We had meals dropped off that we could just pop into the oven. After that, not to much, which was to be expected.” For some, the lack of check-ins can be even more profound. As one new parent shared, “No one checked in on me.”
Another new parent shared, “I found that people with kids checked in on me for a lot longer than anyone else. They knew that postpartum can actually become more challenging with time…”
Others receive more support. As one mom who is seven months postpartum shared, “My mom still visits every week to see my son and let me have a nap or do whatever I need to do or just give me some company. She brought food with her for the first month or so but slowly stopped that because I said I was good and enjoying cooking again. My in laws were super pushy when my son was born about seeing him straight away and now they basically refuse to come visit us and expect us to come to them and even then seem uninterested in visiting anyway.”
It’s important for those around new parents to remain consistent in their check-ins. As one new parent shared, “[People visited in the] first two weeks or so. And suddenly those “friends” of mine stopped texting. And some of them have kids. I get life is busy but sometimes a text of “hey how you doing” would be nice. And I do reach out myself but it feels one sided.”
A consistent source of support is key during this time, as it can make all the difference for new parents. Friends and family should strive to remain consistent in their check-ins and be there for the new parents in their lives.