21 Heartfelt Stories of How Parenthood Changes Everything
Becoming a parent is one of the most transformative experiences in a person’s life. It brings about profound changes that extend far beyond the everyday responsibilities of raising a child. Parenthood reshapes priorities, alters perspectives, and introduces a new depth of emotion and understanding. From finding joy in the simplest moments to reevaluating career aspirations, the journey of raising children leads to significant personal growth and a deeper appreciation for life. In this article, we’ll showcase 21 Reddit responses on how parenthood has changed their perspective.
I’m Less Angry
“I’m less angry. I used to get easily frustrated and my anger manifested physically (stomping, slamming doors, etc.) but I really didn’t want that for my daughter so I’m more chill now.”
Before becoming a parent, many individuals find themselves easily frustrated. However, the arrival of a child often brings a significant shift in this behavior. The desire to provide a calm and nurturing environment for their child leads parents to develop better anger management skills. They become more mindful of their reactions and work hard to maintain a serene atmosphere, understanding that their behavior sets a powerful example for their children.
Thinking About Mortality
The same respondent said, “I think about death more. My sense of self preservation is higher due to my desire to want to be around for my daughter
The sense of self-preservation intensifies after becoming a parent. As new parents realize that their presence is crucial for the child’s upbringing, they become more cautious and aware of their mortality. This heightened awareness often leads to healthier lifestyle choices and a greater emphasis on safety. Parents begin to think long-term, planning for their child’s future and ensuring they are around to witness and support their growth.
Becoming a Parent Turned Me into a Morning Person
As many parents can attest to becoming a parent unintentionally turns a person into a morning person. One person said, “becoming a parent turned me into a morning person. Not by choice, but by my toddler’s.” Another agreed and said parenthood “turned me into a super early morning person to get a few hours of peace and quiet before the kids wake up.”
Many parents find that their sleep patterns change drastically after the arrival of their children. Toddlers, in particular, are early risers, which in turn makes turns their parents into early risers as well. Some parents even start waking up earlier than their children in order to enjoy some peace and quiet before the day begins with busy toddlers and chores. Parents who do wake up earlier might use this time for personal activities, planning the day, or simply enjoying a moment of solitude before the hustle and bustle begins.
Shattered Illusions of Invincibility
As another respondent put it, parenthood often brings a stark realization of life’s fragility. “Becoming a parent shattered my illusions of invincibility. Suddenly, the world seemed infinitely more precarious. It’s realizing that you’re responsible for this tiny, fragile life, and the weight of that responsibility is suffocating. But amidst the fear and uncertainty, there’s a profound clarity – every decision carries unimaginable consequences, and every moment becomes an opportunity to protect, nurture, and cherish. It’s a heartbreaking awakening to the fragility of life, but also a poignant reminder of its immense value.”
Humbled by Changing Diapers
Others are humbled by the mere fact of changing soiled diapers. “There’s something about changing a dirty diaper that both humbles you and puts things in perspective. Suddenly you don’t care if people think you’re cool. You don’t care what people think at all because it doesn’t seem important anymore. A lot of the things that used to consume you doesn’t seem important anymore.” The act itself is grounding and strips away any sense of ego. Suddenly, concerns about what others think or superficial worries seem trivial. Parenthood shifts focus from external validation to the immediate, practical needs of the child.
Calmer While Driving
“I am much more calm while driving because I don’t want some crazy driver to road rage me and stop me from getting home to my kids.” Becoming a parent can also lead to changes in driving behavior. The desire to ensure that you get home from work day after day to be available for your children makes parents more cautious and patient on the road. They become more aware of the risks and the potential consequences of aggressive driving.
Like Getting a Promotion
Another likened parenthood is often likened to getting a promotion. “Becoming a parent is like getting a promotion. You have more responsibilities, everyone looks up to you, and somehow you end up with less money.” A promotion comes increased responsibilities, higher stakes, and a greater need for leadership and decision-making, which is very similar to becoming a first-time parent. Parents find themselves in a position where they are looked up to and relied upon, much like a leader in a professional setting. However, as was humorously pointed out, the increased responsibility doesn’t often come with more money, truly much like getting a job promotion.
From Main Character to Supporting Role
“I went from being the main character in my story, to a supporting role in theirs. It’s an amazing feeling and huge positive shift from where I was before my daughter was born.” Many parents experience a profound shift in their sense of self after having children. Prior to parenthood, they might have focused primarily on their personal goals and desires. However, the birth of a child often transforms this perspective. Parents find themselves stepping into a supporting role, prioritizing their child’s needs and well-being above their own. The shift brings a deeper sense of purpose and satisfaction, as parents witness their children grow and thrive, knowing they played a crucial role in that development.
Greater Awareness of Behavior’s Impact
Parenthood brings a heightened awareness of how one’s behavior impacts others. One respondent said, “I’ve always tried to live kindly, but it turns out I was always a bit selfish. Having my son made me really look at my behaviour, attitude and language. I want him to be proud of me for who I am as a person, rather than what I own or what my job title is.” Before having children, individuals might not fully grasp the ripple effect of their actions and attitudes. However, the responsibility of raising a child who looks up to them for guidance and example can be a powerful motivator for self-improvement.
Delayed Connection with Child
Despite the instant love many feel as soon as their child is born, some parents don’t develop this love immediately. “I did not have that rush of love when my son was placed on my chest, he was around one when I really felt a connection with him,” one parent said. Realizing that you do not have that instant connection can be unsettling, especially since societal expectations often emphasize an instant connection. However, as parents spend time caring for and interacting with their child, it’s inevitable that the bond strengthens and deepens.
Reflection on Past Behavior
Children have a unique way of reflecting their parents’ past behaviors and attitudes. Many parents find themselves recognizing traits and actions in their children that remind them of their younger selves. As one respondent said, “I love my kids but… they showed me how much of an annoyance I was at their age. Sorry Mom and Dad.”
This reflection can be both amusing and humbling, as it brings a new understanding of the challenges their own parents faced. It often leads to a sense of empathy and gratitude towards their parents, and a desire to guide their children with the wisdom gained from their own experiences.
Extra Grace To Other Parents
One person said that becoming a parent made them feel more empathetic to other parents as you realize that there are many things you can’t control. They pointed out that they feel “extra grace for other parents. Kids are their own selves, they come with their own wiring and program. Yes, you have an influence not only in genetics but in how you behave and teach them, but there are some things you just have no control over.”
Appreciation for the Little Things
Becoming a parent can shift a person’s perspective on the mundane, everyday moments that might have previously gone unnoticed. One person shared, being a parent has “made me feel more appreciative of the little things.” As many parents can attest to, it is a parent’s joy to witness their child discover the world, from the first time they see a butterfly to their reaction to tasting new foods. These seemingly mundane events become sources of immense joy and wonder. Children teach us to slow down and savor these moments, as these fleeting experiences are what make life truly rich and meaningful.
Heightened Awareness of Mortality
“You appreciate time much more when you’re a parent because kids grow up very fast. You also don’t take much risks,” one response said.
The joy of parenthood is often accompanied by a heightened awareness of mortality. The fear of losing a child or not being there for them can be overwhelming. This awareness can lead to a more cautious approach to life, where parents are more mindful of their health and safety. They might avoid unnecessary risks and take measures to ensure their longevity, driven by the desire to be present for their children as they grow.
Unconditional Love
“Children are really the only unconditional love that exists. There are conditions to every other relationship you’ll ever have.” One of the most profound changes that come with parenthood is experiencing true unconditional love. Unlike other relationships, which often come with conditions and expectations, the love a parent feels for a child is pure and unwavering. This bond teaches parents about selflessness, sacrifice, and the true meaning of love. It also redefines their understanding of relationships, highlighting the depth and intensity of parental love compared to other forms of affection.
Living in the Present
“I’m far more grounded now and live in the present. Before, I often got lost in thinking of the future and dwelled too much on the past. My daughter doesn’t care about either of those and forces me to live in the here and now which is a good place to be.” Children have a unique way of grounding their parents in the present moment. Their spontaneity and wonder force parents to focus on the here and now, rather than getting lost in the past or the future. This shift can be incredibly liberating, as it encourages parents to engage fully with their children and appreciate the present moment.
Slowing Down and Finding Beauty in Simplicity
One person shared that they have learned to slow down, take their time, and see the beauty in the ordinary since becoming a parent. “I know that sounds so cliche but I remember a moment when my son was around 9 months old. We were in the bedroom and I opened the blinds and he noticed the tree moving and making a shadow against the sun. It was so fascinating for him and was a good reminder for me that simple things can be beautiful.” Parenthood often necessitates a slower pace of life, which can lead to a newfound appreciation for simplicity. This slower pace allows parents to reconnect with the world around them and see it through their children’s eyes. It also fosters a sense of gratitude for the simple pleasures in life, which can be incredibly fulfilling.
Cherishing Sleep and Moments of Peace
For others, sleep and peace has become most treasured. “It made me cherish sleep like a long-lost friend. Every moment of peace is a luxury now. Life’s all about those little moments you can steal for yourself amidst a constant cycle of responsibilities.” The demands of parenting often lead to sleep deprivation and much responsibility. As a result, parents come to long for sleep and peace like never before. These moments become precious and are savored whenever they occur. It also teaches parents to appreciate the small luxuries in life, such as a quiet cup of coffee or a peaceful evening.
Reevaluation of Career Goals
The birth of a child often prompts parents to reassess their career goals and priorities. The desire to be more present for their children can lead to a shift away from the relentless pursuit of career advancement. One person shared, “The interest in climbing the career ladder extinguished the moment I became a father.” After becoming parents, many seek more flexible work arrangements or even consider career changes that align better with their family life. This reevaluation can lead to more fulfilling career choices that prioritize work-life balance and personal satisfaction over financial gain or status. The focus shifts to creating a stable and nurturing environment for their children, which often means making sacrifices in other areas of life.
Joy and Awe Through a Child’s Eyes
“Life is more joyful and full of awe, when viewed with your children. Nothing in life, not my career, my degrees, my marriage, my pets, or my fills me with more hope and gratitude than being a mom.”
One of the most remarkable changes that come with parenthood is the ability to experience the world anew through a child’s eyes. Parents often find that their children bring a sense of joy and wonder to everyday experiences. Whether it’s the excitement of a trip to the park or the curiosity sparked by a new book, children have a way of making the mundane magical.
Embracing Chaos and Imperfection
Parenthood teaches the valuable lesson of embracing chaos and imperfection. As one person said, “I learned that living in chaos is sometimes ok and to embrace the moments.” The constant presence of toys scattered around the house, the messes that come with meals and playtime, and the unpredictable nature of children’s behavior can be overwhelming. However, parents learn to see these moments as part of the beautiful chaos of raising children. They come to understand that these “good messes” are temporary and that one day, the house will be quiet and orderly again. This realization helps parents to be more present and to cherish the fleeting moments of their children’s childhood.
17 Reasons Why Your Kids Should Share A Room
Deciding whether or not to have your children share a room can be a challenging decision for many parents. While some families have ample space to provide individual rooms for each child, others may find that room-sharing is a practical necessity. Beyond the logistical considerations, there are numerous benefits to having siblings share a room that can positively impact their emotional, social, and developmental growth. Here are some reasons why you shouldn’t feel guilty about letting your kids share a room.
17 Reasons Why Your Kids Should Share A Room
The Future Of Family: 17 Surprising Truths About Gen Z Parents
As the generational wheel turns, each brings its unique set of values, perspectives, and approaches to parenting. Gen Z, the cohort born between the mid-1990s and early 2010s, is beginning to enter the realm of parenthood. These digital natives, who grew up amidst rapid technological advancements, economic fluctuations, and a growing awareness of global issues, are carving out a new path in parenting that reflects their distinct worldview. Here are some surprising truths about Gen Z parents.
The Future Of Family: 17 Surprising Truths About Gen Z Parents
Source: Reddit
